Inner Critic Coaching - How to Silence That Little Voice Holding You Back
Inner Critic Causes
The inner critic is that little voice inside your head that tells you that you're not good enough, that you can't do it, and that you're going to fail. It's the voice of self doubt, insecurity, and negative self-talk. Below you'll find a list of potential causes of the inner critic.
The inner critic is usually born out of our own experiences and beliefs. It's the result of our past failures, rejections, and disappointments. It's also the result of our own negative self-talk and negative thinking
The inner critic can also be a result of the messages we received from our parents, teachers, and other authority figures when we were growing up. If we were constantly told that we were not good enough, or that we would never amount to anything, then those messages can become ingrained in our minds and can become our own inner critic
The inner critic is also fed by the media, which often portrays an unrealistic standard of beauty and success that is unattainable for most people. When we compare ourselves to these unrealistic standards, it's only natural for our inner critic to tell us that we're not good enough
Function of the Inner Critic
The inner critic is a defense mechanism that evolved to protect us from danger. It's like an alarm system that goes off when it detects a threat. The problem is, the inner critic doesn't always know when to stop. Once it's been triggered, it can keep going even when there's no longer any danger.
The inner critic is also a way of judging ourselves. It's like a teacher that is constantly critiquing our every move. While it's important to have some self-criticism in order to improve and grow, too much self-criticism can be harmful. When the inner critic is in control, it can hold you back from your greatest success.
What Does the Inner Critic Do to a Person?
The inner critic can have a debilitating effect on a person's life. It can cause us to doubt ourselves, our abilities, and our worth. It can keep us from taking risks, from pursuing our dreams, and from living a full and happy life.
The inner critic can also lead to anxiety, depression, and other mental health issues. It can make us feel stressed, overwhelmed, and hopeless. It can cause us to isolate ourselves and to withdraw from the world.
Types of Inner Critic
1. The perfectionist is never satisfied. No matter how hard you try, it's never good enough. The perfectionist is always critical and judgmental.
2. The control freak is always trying to control everything. It's never happy with the way things are. The control freak is always worried and anxious.
3. The self-doubter is always doubting oneself. It's never sure if it can do something or not. The self-doubter is always second-guessing itself.
4. The self-critic is always critiquing oneself. It's never happy with the way it looks or feels. The self-critic is always judging itself.
5. The impostor always feels like a fraud. They are never sure if it's good enough. The impostor is always afraid of being exposed.
Quieting Your Inner Critic
The inner critic is a powerful force, but it doesn't have to control our lives. There are things we can do to quiet the inner critic and to learn to love and accept ourselves just as we are.
1. Recognize When the Inner Critic Is Speaking
The first step to silencing the inner critic is to become aware of when it's speaking. Pay attention to the thoughts that are running through your head. Are they positive or negative? Are they helpful or harmful?
2. Don't Believe Everything the Inner Critic Says
Just because the inner critic is speaking doesn't mean you have to believe everything it says. Remember, it's just a voice inside your head, and it's not always accurate or true.
3. Respond to the Inner Critic in a Kind and Compassionate Way
When you catch yourself believing the inner critic's lies, respond to yourself in a kind and compassionate way. Talk to yourself the way you would talk to a friend who is going through a tough time.
4. Practice Mindfulnes
Mindfulness is the practice of being present in the moment and accepting things just as they are. When you're mindful, you're not judging yourself or your experience. You're simply observing it without judgment.
5. Seek Professional Help
If the inner critic is having a debilitating effect on your life, seek professional help. A therapist can help you learn to quiet the inner critic and to love and accept yourself just as you are.
Take some time to journal about your inner critic. Explore its impact on your life and what you can do to quiet it. Remember, you don't have to listen to the inner critic's lies.
“Remember, you have been criticizing yourself for years and it hasn’t worked.
Try approving of yourself and see what happens.”
Inner Critic Journal Prompts
What are some of the things the inner critic says to you
Why do you think the inner critic exists?
What effect does the inner critic have on your life?
How can you quiet the inner critic?
What are some things you can do to love and accept yourself just as you are?
Inner Critic Facts
A study published in the journal Psychological Science found that people who are self-critical are more likely to experience anxiety, depression, and other mental health issues. Those who are self-critical are also more likely to have negative thoughts about themselves and they are more likely to ruminate on their mistakes and to beat themselves up over them. Those who are self-critical are also more likely to have low self-esteem. Another study found that people who are self-critical are more likely to have difficulty coping with stress, and engage in self-destructive behaviors.
Take a moment to ask yourself, in what way does your inner critic manifest? How does it effect you? Has it dampened any areas of your life? How, if at all, has your inner critic been holding you back? Looking inwards and practicing self-reflection can be a great tool for healing and understanding your inner-critic.
Interested in Learning More About Your Inner Critic?
Here are some additional resources to help tackle your inner critic. Please Google the titles below.
Feeling Insecure? 6 Tips to Quiet Your Inner Critic – NPR
Four Steps For Shutting Up Your Inner Critic - Fast Company
How to Tame Your Inner Critic - Psychology Today